Flexibility of Responses

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Now in this metal of a skill or pattern, when it comes to flexibility responses involves cultivating within ourselves more flexibility and responding. Now apologize that sounds a little bit redundant, but kind of work with me here. And here’s the thing, right now, when we discover a set of responses that we don’t want, or something that isn’t getting us what we want to receive, we want this just it makes logical sense to do something different, right? I mean, you can expect to keep doing the same thing over and over again and expect to get a different result. That’s the definition of a creative person and where we’re not advocating craziness on any level whatsoever. Now, it is a basic NLP communication guideline that we operate from when utilized into some technique, which is the meaning of our communication is the response that we get. So what do we mean by that? Right? You know, there’s a lot of people where when they communicate with another person, they believe that the meaning of the communication is whatever they think in their heads is supposed to mean. But if you’re speaking with someone, and then not get give you the response that you’re looking for, or they’re interpreting it differently than how you’re imagining it in your head, then you have to be able to alter what it is that you’re doing. So that way they understand what it is that you mean. Because the worst thing that you can possibly be is just be really stubborn about how you’re communicating and just keep doing the same thing over and over again and hope that that other person is going to catch on to something because what’s gonna happen is oppresses Polly isn’t gonna catch on and just going to get really annoyed at you. And yeah, it’s going to make you look very ineffective as communicator. So the NLP model encourages our development of flexibility by presupposing, that everyone, and I mean, everyone operates I’ve don’t own model of the world. Now you see, not everybody model of the world works very well, or works well to any degree whatsoever. I mean, some people’s models work better than other models, but it does work, at least to some extent. Now, depending on However, a person constructs his or her reality, his or her responses are going to make sense in that construction. So everybody’s worldview, a world point does make sense to a certain degree. Now, granted, like I said, some are better than others, some are more useful, and some are less harmful compared to other worlds us, but everyone has their own unique worldview. So the first thing that we want to do, understanding that, that everyone has their own model of the world that they operate from, we want to begin by calibrating to that other person’s reality. So that way, we can figure out how that system of meaning works. Now this is a pattern or technique, at least we talked about in a previous video about calibrating to, um, to someone’s model of the world or to someone’s worldview. So if you haven’t seen that video yet, I definitely recommend um, going back and watching that video, because we’ll make a little bit more sense in terms of what we’re talking about. So once you’ve done the work of calibrating and a pacing, which is our two techniques we talked about previously, now we can go we could run in the college check ecology check on the system, which is also another technique that we talked about. So if you haven’t seen calibrating pacing on a college track, I definitely recommend checking out those PVS videos. So this will make a little bit more sense. So once we do that, and we run the ecology check, and we done the pacing, and the calibrating. Now we can understand now we can put that person in a position to decide whether or not that was it thoughts, the values or the beliefs are either supporting them or for is hurting naturally. So having flexibility within ourselves, helps us to realize that everyone operates from their own map of reality, and that we all navigate and make decisions based upon that map. So it makes you a lot more understanding of other people, when you’re able to be more flexible in how you respond to other people, because everybody comes from has an own walk of life has their own way of thinking about things and the viewing thing. So if you lock yourself into just one particular way, or one particular viewpoint is very impoverished, and what happens is, you limit the scope of the amount of people you can reach out and you can communicate with. So I’m Barbara B. Belknap, and now Michael Hall to people who wrote a source book of magic, which is an excellent book, by the way, they said that, to the extent that we believe in our beliefs, we have low flexibility. And to the extent that we question our beliefs, and recognize them as mental constructs and being inherently infallible, we develop greater flexibility and tentativeness. So at the end of the day, we all have our beliefs that pretty much run in the background of our minds, that pretty much dictate how we go and we act in the world. So I mean, it is good to have beliefs but if you believe in your beliefs to the point where you couldn’t believe any other way, well, you think this 100% of right and there’s no other way to look at things, then you’re very limited in how you can respond in the world. But if you can understand that, you know what I could be wrong about something I am open to learning something new, if I am wrong, even if it means letting go of a deeply cherished belief, now you put yourself in a position to be a very powerful and a very dynamic communicator. So guys, that’s all I have for you today for disome technique. Stay tuned for the next video NLP technique number six, we’re going to be talking about state elicitation.