Boundaries

Welcome to the burnout session for the letter B and the B stands for boundaries. My name is Michael Leavitt, and I’m the chief burnout officer breakfast leadership calm. Thank you for joining us today. Before we start talking about boundaries, however, we need to get a better definition of what burnout is. We hear about it a lot. But for many of us, we may not know the definition of burnout and of course, there are several versions of this. But this is the one that seems to resonate with myself and and the people that I talk with and deal with. burnout is a state of emotional physical and mental exhaustion that is caused by excessive and prolonged stress. So if you were stressed consistently for a long period of time, you were definitely setting up the tables for being burned out. burnout happens when you’re overwhelmed and emotionally and physically drained. And you’re not able to meet the constant demands of life. Too often we load up our plates with too much. And if you’re eating, and your plate is too full, that’s not good for you. And if you’re loading up the plate of tasks and to do list items and chores, and appointments, it’s going to be the same thing. It’s not good for you. You need to have boundaries around how you spend your time. Now, what signs of burnout come in, will really help you start recognizing if you’re burning out or approaching burnout, and also for people that are in your life. You can see the signs of life they may be burned out. The fine excuse me the five Common Signs of burnout or poor sleep, lost motivation, increased some mistakes and more memory, decision making struggles and irritability. Let’s dive into each of those real quick. Sleep is crucial. And if you’re not sleeping well, then you’re going to feel that the next day, the next week, the next month, potentially the next year if you don’t sleep well at all. Sleep is an ability for us to repair the damage that we do to ourselves on a daily basis. And even if you live the healthiest of life, lives, I should say, and you don’t do anything wrong. You don’t drink, you don’t smoke. You don’t eat fast food, all these things that society often shames us about. Let’s say you just don’t do any of that stuff and you live this pure life. You still do damage to your body. Because the physical moment or movements and the environment and things you consume, both from drinking and heating, but also the air you breathe and the things that you watch and things you listen And the things you read, all take a toll on you. So restful sleep is crucial because when you have restful sleep, your body’s actually repairing the damage that we do to ourselves on a daily basis. And if you take advantage of that sleep and you really get a good restful sleep, time and time again and again and again, then it helps reduce the stress in your life. Also, when you’re burned out, the motivation goes away. Things you used to enjoy doing, you stop going to and doing experiencing, whether it’s concerts, or ballgames or reading or other things you enjoy in life, when you’re burned out. You stop doing those things because you don’t want to do them. Because you’re just so stressed. You can’t enjoy those moments and be in the moment when you’re there. If you’re making a lot of mistakes and you’re forgetful and that’s something that is not normal for you, that is a huge warning sign that you might be burning out. So if you’re making mistakes at work When you normally don’t do that, it’s definitely something you want to take a look at, because you might be burning out. And even decision making can be problematic. Because when you’re stressed and fatigued, you can’t make any decisions. You’re you’re confused by them. Your your judgment is clouded. And I’m not talking about what do we want for dinner, I’m talking about just normal tasks and decisions that we normally make on a day to day basis without any issues become huge problems if you’re burned out. And if you’re short with people, and you’re not normally irritable, but you now are with loved ones, or co workers or colleagues you normally get along with, it’s possible that you are burning out. Now the boundaries. We’ve heard the word boundaries, we may think it has something to do with a border, which Yeah, physical boundaries such as borderlines between states or countries. Yeah. That’s definitely a boundary. But the boundaries I’m talking about here are personal boundaries, personal boundaries on how you deal with things in life. And we’ll start off with mental boundaries, what you think about how you react to people, things that trigger you. These are all mental boundaries, you know, boundaries of what you think about what kind of things excite you, what things upset you, these are all things you want to lay out. Coupled with that is emotional boundaries. Maybe you get triggered because of situations that are going on in life and they remind you of past traumas, maybe you’re in a bad relationship. Maybe you have issues with your parents, or your loved ones, or your kids or your co workers. Anything’s possible. But emotional boundaries and protecting those boundaries are crucial. physical boundaries, I alluded to those earlier. But in the middle of a pandemic, we’re all willing Where have you stay six feet or two meters apart depending on what part of the world you’re in. So physical boundaries are, don’t touch me or Please keep your distance from me. Spiritual boundaries are respecting others and your own spirituality. Your Walk of Faith, if you have one may differ from a co worker or a loved one, respecting those protecting your boundaries but understanding that they too have a right to believe in what they believe in is crucial. Sexual boundaries is hopefully self explanatory, but if not, we’ve all heard the phrase No means no. The me to movement that is gone through the world in recent years. long overdue. And sexual boundaries are important to protect yourself and those that are around you. And word of advice to people if you and I’ll use This example this is more of a physical boundary. If you like shaking hands or hugging with people, and they say it’s okay to hug with them, make sure that it always is because sometimes things change and they may not be comfortable. And if they don’t tell you, then that could be a problem. So respect people’s boundaries when it comes to physical boundaries and definitely sexual boundaries. Material boundaries, talks about the things you have in your life. And what do you have in your life as far as different assets, you know, your phone, your toys, your TV, your stereo equipment, your hockey gear or your whatever the case may be anything you collect. There’s material boundaries on there and respecting your stuff and also respecting other people’s stuff. So you respect those boundaries and make sure that if you borrow something, you return it to them. And vice versa. Some you loan some than somebody they should return it back to you. And then finally, money boundaries. This is always a sore subject with people and has ended many relationship and is created a lot of problems for people and stress. People stress about money during recessions and depressions and pandemics, money situations can be really problematic. And not having boundaries around how you spend your money and how you interact with money is a big, big issue. And it’s important for you to be able to have those boundaries in your life because if you don’t, then it leads to big stress and burnout. And that’s not good. So if your take home assignment and those boundaries that you just saw, what boundaries Will you implement today? What are going to be some boundaries that you are going to establish that you don’t have now that are going to help you prevent high stress and ultimately burnout