3 Types of Relationships & How They Feel

Now that you’ve set your goals, let’s begin. The first thing that you can do to make the most of your life outside of work, without even having to change jobs is to multiply the number of relationships in your life that are just awesome. This is all about creating more time for your best relationships, and being able to find more like them. So without getting too judgmental, I’m going to simply determine and use a labeling system here where we say that some of our relationships are awesome. Some of them are mediocre, and some of them are bad, not bad in the sense that they’ve been naughty or mean or that they’re getting colds and their stockings for Christmas. But they’re just not for you. They don’t work for you. And so for right now, this pie chart kind of demonstrates what percentage of your relationships fall into each of these categories. Our goal throughout the course of this program is to set you on a path that will eventually help you to create a life that looks More like this, that’d be really clear. There are some relationships that maybe you can’t get away from as easily. Sometimes it’s coworkers or family or things that over time, you might decide that you’re going to stay in the relationship because it’s somebody in your family or you’ve decided to support somebody, emotionally, or however it might be. But overall if you can be choosing the relationships you want, and even if you stay in some of the relationships that aren’t as great as you’d like, you can choose how much time you invest there. This can be a big step forward in creating the life you most desire. So overall, when we consider relationships, they really color or impact our lenses in our worldview. Most of us see the world from our own subjective worldview. We don’t see it as it really is, but how we perceive it. So our worldview, our perception of the world, can be changed by our mood. Our confidence are experiences or health or geography and many variables. Put simply are really Ships affect our world, our worldview, and everything in our world. So one of the best ways to improve our world is to improve our relationships. Now, measuring relationships is really difficult because they’re intangible in some ways. But I’m going to suggest to you that in order to make this something you can take action on, we’re going to put numbers on things. And in all of this, I’m still going with a very basic assumption. I happen to believe all people are created equally, you might or might not hold that belief. I happen to believe there’s a crater in the universe, some divine force somehow I don’t know exactly what it looks like or, or operates like, but I believe there’s a benevolent force you might or might not. But regardless of whether or not I think people are created nicely or not, or have equal rights, I’m gonna evaluate the relationship as to whether or not it’s something that supports me creates greater happiness to my life, and simply if I want to be in it or not, so it might be impossible to quantify it. Relationships are people we can measure or assign numbers to our feelings about relationships, and how they impact us. So we can evaluate our relationships without being negative or judgmental. We don’t have to say that we’re better than this person. But we can still be strong enough and clear enough to decide what we like and what we don’t like. So maybe we can’t quantify the taste of chocolate or vanilla ice cream. But we can, number one, quantify how we feel about it, to decide if we want more or less of it. And we can do this without being mean or nasty. We don’t have to put another person down or we don’t have to hate on chocolate ice cream for that matter. We can simply choose that we want more of what’s for us and less of what’s not for us. And so again, using this basic concept, if we have awesome, mediocre and bad relationships, the first thing I want you to consider in this first exercise is how do each of these types of relationships make you feel and as you’re doing exercises Throughout this program, I’m going to pause, feel free to pause the video and do the exercise or pause the audio if you’re listening to this and do the exercise, but the first thing is how does an awesome relationship lead you to feel? How about a mediocre relationship? And how about a bad relationship? In each of these types of relationships, how are you treated? What’s your energy level? Like? Is it high? Is it low? Is it somewhere in between in each of these types of relationships? And how do people in awesome relationships speak to you? How about mediocre relationships? And how do people in bad relationships speak to you? How do you know? It’s an awesome relationship? What is it about that relationship that tells you it’s an awesome relationship? And how do you know it’s a mediocre relationship? How do you know it’s a bad relationship? As we start to identify patterns? Are there any patterns and where you meet the people? Who are in awesome relationships with you? How about the mediocre relationships? Is there a pattern as to where you normally meet those people? And what about the bad relationships? And then finally, for this first exercise, how does your life flow in the moments that you’re operating in a relationship that feels awesome? And how does your life flow when it’s mediocre? And how does your life flow It feels bad. So if you haven’t already, I really encourage you take the time, do this exercise before you move forward. As I’ve mentioned, there’s not a lot of philosophy in this program, it’s more about taking action. Now, if you prefer to listen to everything through once, then go back into the exercises. I understand that I’ve done that before, sometimes myself, but I really want to communicate to you clearly that without doing the exercises, you’re really missing out the main part of it. You’re missing a piece that’s going to help you make a big shift in your life.